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In other words, women may experience more fear around things that men may not be as socialized to be afraid of, and thus they cry more frequently. In their practices, they see women struggle more often than men with self-induced pressure (e.g., that aforementioned perfectionism). Van Niel and Melody Wilding, a licensed social worker and performance coach for high achievers, posit that women may cry in stressful situations more often than do men. With that said, certain demographics may be more prone to the reaction than others. So, the "anxiety crying" response is specific to each individual's experiences, traumas, and traits. But not everyone experiences fear as strongly in the performance review situation as the person who cries, and some may not feel fear at all. If fiercely felt, fear can cause you to cry just as easily as can the sudden passing of a loved one. All of those have one underlying emotion in common: fear. For example, in the performance review anecdote, Maureen Sayres Van Niel, MD, president of the American Psychiatric Association Women's Caucus, cites imposter syndrome, perfectionism, and power dynamics as potential triggers for the anxiety tears. The "anxiety crying" response is specific to each individual's experiences, traumas, and traits.Īs for why you’re among those who cry in stressful situations-whether it be a performance review, a test, a date at the doctor's, or anything else that causes you to feel anxiety-the answer is simply (and, perhaps, annoyingly) that everyone is different. And although he says it’s not as common to cry when you’re anxious as it is when you’re sad or in pain, some people experience the emotion so intensely that it can provoke tears. Rosmarin, PhD, ABPP, the founder and director of Center for Anxiety, crying can be triggered by any overwhelming emotional or physical experience, including everything from a stubbed toe to a commercial for sad-eyed orphan animals to a marriage proposal. Still, you begin to involuntarily cry as he or she awkwardly attempts to walk you through a very mild and non-threatening conversation. You know you're good at your job and that your boss likes you.
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It's time for your annual performance review.